A Barbie Looking for Her Ken: Bachelorette 20, Episode 3
It was the Black men in terrible wigs for me.
This episode had it all; drama, well-placed flashbacks, Barbie outfits, and romantic moments between Charity and several of her men. I think these season’s editors went to the Bravo school of editing because we’re getting flashbacks, inside jokes from previous seasons, better editing to paint a fuller picture, and ITMs (in-the-moment interviews) where the men feel comfortable enough to tell all. We love to see it!
A Date In Brayden’s Hometown Featuring Brayden
Charity enters the mansion and lets the guys know she can’t continue her journey in LA, which is why they’re all headed to Oceanside, California. A town that is literally 90 miles away from LA, but go off I guess 🙄.
One lucky guy gets a chance to ride to Oceanside in a helicopter with Charity and that man is Brayden. The guys are upset that Brayden is getting the one-on-one date and they’re hoping Charity is able to see through his bullshit (she won’t).
While Brayden and Charity are enjoying the aerial sites, Brayden can’t help but make every single detail about him. He’s pointing to where he grew up, he’s talking about landing at Petco Park, he’s saying that he has a story for every single thing they’re gonna see in the San Diego area (and he indeed does). He talked so much on this date. I’m sure it was excitement and nerves, but my goodness it was annoying.
They land at the Padres baseball stadium where they get the chance to play catch, have a picnic, try on their new personalized jerseys, and hang out with the Padres mascot, which is literally a bald man. I don’t get sports.
When Brayden got the First Impression Rose, I thought Charity’s choice was genuine, but during the day portion of this date, it didn’t seem like she was feeling him. They discussed Brayden’s doubts and fears of having to share Charity’s affection with other men and she says she doesn’t want to waste her time giving her all to a relationship when the other person isn’t doing the same. So, she plans to use the nighttime portion of the date to suss out whether Brayden can really handle staying throughout the process and focusing on her.
At the hotel, the men are discussing how annoying Brayden is (agreed). A date card arrives and everyone is on it except Warwick. John is especially upset that he wasn’t selected for the one-on-one date. But the men congratulate Warwick and accept their fates.
During the night portion of their one-on-one, Charity and Brayden discuss him wanting to leave last week. Charity says she doesn’t want to ignore red flags at the beginning of their time together and she’s concerned that Brayden was so ready to leave the week prior. Personally, I was shocked that she didn’t bring up his (alleged) classless comments. That would piss me off more than being unsure about this process. The process is weird, it is uncomfortable to openly date several people at the same time, and get very little time with the person you’re all pining for before proposing.
Charity was satisfied with Brayden’s honesty and explanation of why it’s tough for him to see her date other men (he blamed his jealousy on being cheated), but I wasn’t satisfied. I am not someone who views this show thinking contestants know what they are signing up for, but I do side-eye contestants early on in the process who can’t accept that the lead will date several other people, semi-seriously before whittling the group down. Brayden seemed territorial to me and I think Charity was blinded by his looks, smile, and sweet talk.
Ken, You Feel The Love Tonight?
On the date: Joey, Aaron B., Michael, James, Caleb, Aaron S., Sean, Xavier, Tanner, Adrian, Dotun, John
I don’t understand how these men knew about the Ken pun on the date card and didn’t think they were going on a Barbie-themed date. Truly hate to see it.
Charity and the men walk into what looks like Barbie and Ken’s walk-in closet and Charity literally runs to former Bachelorette Jojo and her fiancé Jordan, who are hosting this date. It was this moment that solidified that Charity is definitely a Bachelor Nation fan.
This date is, of course, an ad for the new Barbie movie. The men are tasked with dressing in an iconic Ken outfit and writing a little love song to the tune of “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.” Charity is in a cute hot pink shorts suit with matching heels looking like a Bachelorette Barbie.
The men killed it, obviously, none of them could sing, but there was a level of commitment and witty lyrics from each of them that I respected. Dotun invited her on stage and sang (horribly) to her, Aaron B. sang about naming their future son, and Sean brought Charity on stage to end his performance with a kiss, very smooth. In the end, Charity chose Double Denim Ken (aka Sean) as the winner to spend some special one-on-one time with her.
The men were legitimately upset they didn’t get boardwalk time with Charity, I guess that speaks to the impression she’s left on each of them. I didn’t like Aaron S.'s comments about being a “real man” in comparison to Sean. Sure, Sean is blonde hair, blue-eyed, and seems like a nepo baby with a trust fund, but does that really make him any less of a man? Aaron’s comments were unnecessary and they continued into the cocktail party that night.
Sean walks into the group date cocktail party confident as hell, singing his song from the day portion of the date and the men are UPSET. Especially Aaron S. He tells Sean to read the room and be humble, but c’mon that is not what this show is about. If that wasn’t enough, Sean asks to see Charity first after already getting solo time with her earlier in the day. When Sean returns, the men spend time fighting with him instead of going to spend time with Charity.
John and Dotun’s time with Charity stuck out to me. John speaks from the heart and is honest about how much he likes her and wants to get to know her. He also makes sure to share something about himself each moment he spends with her. Last night, we learned he plays the guitar at his church.
Next, Dotun gets to go to Charity’s room so they can have some extra special private time. That sounds sexual, but it wasn’t. He’s gassing her up and she’s getting teary-eyed at his compliments. What I love about Dotun is he makes it a point to say her name, maintains eye contact, and makes each short moment he gets with her special with just his words. It feels so genuine and I hope it is, I love him for Charity!
Dotun’s realness works because he gets the group date rose. Thankfully, it doesn’t put a target on his back. Instead, the men blame Sean for taking additional time when he didn’t have to. Fine by me, just leave Dotun out of it.
The Quiet Storm
The men are talking about how quiet Warwick has been throughout the process. So quiet, they were surprised he got the second one-on-one of the week.
Charity and Warwick have the entire carnival to themselves and it seemed like they were having a good time until they go to the ice cream parlor. Warwick wasn’t giving much and Charity was disappointed that he wasn’t interacting with her that much and didn’t scoop her ice cream. She chalks it up to nerves and hopes it’ll get better when they sit down for dinner. Reader, it doesn’t.
At dinner, Charity is asking more questions than we’ve seen a lead have to ask in years. If she hadn’t asked Warwick any questions about himself—all of which he barely answered—we wouldn’t have gotten anything from the man. In his interviews with producers he says he’s tired, but if that was the truth, why not just say that? Maybe he wasn’t feeling Charity and didn’t know how to say that so he acted it out instead. It’s unfortunate because he is gorgeous and I’d hoped he’d burn bright enough to be in contention for Bachelor, but unless he goes to Paradise, has a stand-out season, and ends up single, I think last night is the last we’ll see of Warwick on our screens.
Cocktail Party
As the cocktail party begins, Charity reminds the men that she is there to get engaged and find her life partner. She felt Warwick wasn’t ready for that, so she sent him home.
Joey grabs her first for the night and shares a part of his family with her. Next Xavier shares a scarf he knitted for her, which was so thoughtful. Both of these gestures earn them a kiss and communicate to Charity that they are ready for something serious.
Next, Aaron B. makes the number one mistake contestants make on this show, he tattles about Brayden’s behavior. I hate to see a Black man get wrapped up in a 24-year-old’s drama, it never ends well. Aaron shares that Brayden isn’t ready for an engagement and that he’s been vocal about not wanting to be part of this process. Charity is upset, but it seems to work out well for Aaron. She trusts him enough to feel like he wasn’t coming from a malicious place.
I did respect the fact that Aaron left his time with Charity and went and told Brayden what he did. In his interview with the producers, Brayden admits that what Aaron said about him was true, but he didn’t feel like it was a big deal because he’s said similar things to Charity. Brayden may be telling Charity the truth about how he feels about this process, but he’s doing it with a great deal of sugarcoating. It sounds like he’s being straight-up rude when the cameras aren’t around and expects the other men to respect ‘bro code’ and not report back to Charity.
Xavier calls out Aaron B. for bringing up drama that could ruin the rest of the night and I don’t disagree with him. The other guys start to gang up on Aaron as well. They believe Brayden will sweet talk his way out of this mess and stay another week.
Meanwhile, Charity grabs Brayden and he immediately admits to what he said. He tries to paint his hesitancies as more realistic than the other men because he’s not fawning over her and promising he’ll propose at the end of the process when he barely knows her. Does he have a point, sure. I think healthy skepticism and jealousy have a place in this process, but sugarcoating your truth to one person and then talking (alleged) mad shit behind their back isn’t cool.
Unfortunately, Aaron B.’s revelation shifts the entire night and the cocktail party ends early. Charity is torn about whether to keep Brayden around, even though he already has a rose.
Charity hands out all of the roses before excusing herself to make a decision on whether or not Brayden gets to stay. Ultimately, he stays because of course he does. We still need another episode of his drama before focusing on the more serious connections. Charity said her gut told her to let him stay, so he stayed.
Going home are Aaron S. and James. I’ll miss Aaron’s whit in his interviews with producers, but I think we’ll get more of him in Paradise.
Next week, it looks like my faves Dotun and Xavier get one-on-one dates! And the drama continues between Brayden and Aaron B. I hope Aaron doesn’t get so swept up in the drama that he goes home earlier than he should. We’ll see what happens.
hopping on here to say- great recap!!