Michelle Makes History: Bachelorette, Season 18, Episode 6
Bachelor Nation is in shambles and we have our first all Black final four.
Bachelor Nation is on fire right now. In the worst way. Normally, I wouldn’t spend newsletter/recap space on the drama within the nation, but it’s been too messy the last week not to address some things. Plus, they all tie into a point I want to make, so bear with me (or don’t, recap of the episode starts at the photo of Michelle).
First, Hannah Brown “wrote” a book after barely being able to string a sentence together during her season. God Bless This Mess was released this week and during her press tour last week, she shared that she and Peter Weber hooked up during his season. More specifically, she and Peter Weber hooked up weeks after he ended his engagement with Hannah Ann Sluss and in between him trying to make things work with Madi Prewett. A mess. If that wasn’t enough, they hooked up in his parent’s house. Hannah B. said it was awful (so much for that four times in the windmill mess) and that she awkwardly had breakfast with his parents the next day, IN THEIR HOUSE. Peter, is so lame for all of this and yes, I am blaming Peter. Hannah was unattached and wanted to see if something was there. Peter was half engaged to one woman, interested in another, and then had Hannah in bed at his parent’s house all at the same time.
Next, after dipping below one million followers on Instagram and feeling her 15 minutes of fame dwindling, Katie Thurston decided to capitalize on Taylor Swift dropping new music by participating in “12 Days of Messiness.” This was 12 days of her choosing Taylor Swift songs that described her relationship with her exes from the show. This had the potential to be harmless, cute even, but similar to Swift, Katie didn’t hold back. Day one was Blake (her fiancé of five minutes) and the song “We Are Never Getting Back Together,” and day 12 was her announcing a new relationship with contestant John Hersey from her season coupled with Swift’s song “Begin Again.” Listen, I could really go on and on about what a waste Katie’s season was and how she seemed and still seems obsessed with attention and being famous, but if you want to read those thoughts, just go read my recaps of her season. I’ll end this news with two tweets I made after hearing this information.
Finally, some sad news, another Bachelor Nation break up. People magazine reported Monday afternoon that Tayshia Adams and Zac Clark had ended their engagement. I’m not sure how deep into Bachelor Nation you all are, but if you’re someone that’s into (rather harmless) conspiracy theories, you might appreciate the speculation over on Reddit.
I’ve been surprised by the “love isn’t real,” takes in response to this news. Y’all, we do not know these people. We’ve seen a few hours of them on our TV for 10 weeks, we might have listened to a 30-minute podcast where they were interviewed and we follow them on social where they post the same positive highlight reel content everyone else does. So it’s kind of hard to say that Tayshia and Zac were goals and mean it.
I always felt we were holding their relationship to an unreasonably high standard that we weren’t holding other recent Bach Nation couples to (Katie and Blake, Matt and Rachael, Clare and Dale).
One more thing before I start my recap, I want to address something that’s been bothering me. I listen to more Bachelor podcasts than I’d like to admit, I’m in a few pop culture/Bach related groups on Facebook, and I also live-tweet the episodes (as much as I can in between note-taking) and this idea that Michelle’s season is boring because she’s “too composed” or because there’s no real drama feels unfair. It’s true, Michelle has gotten rid of men on bullshit exceptionally faster than most leads we’ve seen. It’s also true that it doesn’t seem like this season is building up to any big dramatic moment (like a fence jump), but maybe that’s a good thing?
At the end of the day, Michelle is a Black woman who has likely watched the way this network has handled Rachel’s season, then Matt’s season, not to mention how they’ve treated Black contestants throughout its 20-year history. She’s “too composed” and identifies the drama quickly because she has to because this show will take advantage of irrelevant storylines with people who do not matter (Chris S.) and are not a factor in Michelle’s love story. We’ve watched this show and its former host trip over itself when it comes to addressing race and portraying different cultures in relevant, refreshing, non-offensive ways. They’ve fucked it up every single time. So if this less drama, identify the villains quickly and remove them, is them getting it right, I’ll take it.
I’m still side-eyeing producers for not giving us enough of the men of color on this season (we still know very little about Nayte, or Olu and got nothing from Leroy) and I’m questioning why corn-fed Clayton gets to be the Bachelor when Michelle’s top eight is predominately Black, but this finally feels like the diverse season we deserve. This is the season Rachel should’ve gotten years ago, this is what advocating for yourself as a Black woman looks like, this is what poise and class look like, and we don’t get to see that on reality television enough.
So for those who are calling Michelle’s season boring, is it really boring, or is she just not being the Black Bachelorette you expected?
Marinate on that.
Now, on to the recap.
Note: I watch this show unspoiled, however, when a new lead is announced, even if on unofficial channels, I usually look and see who it is. With that in mind, after this intro section, the rest of this recap is written as if the official Bachelor social media accounts and ABC have confirmed who the lead is. At this point, that person’s season has been filmed, so it’s not hearsay. Still, if you don’t know who the next Bachelor is and you don’t want to know, the rest of this recap will spoil who the lead is.
Apparently, it’s the week before hometowns, which seems way too soon, but ok! We start with the men talking about how shocked they are that their group has been cut down to only eight men and that by the end of the week, half of them will go home. Rodney is still maintaining that Michelle has eight amazing guys when we all know Martin ain’t shit.
Michelle is sitting with her students, Ahmed, Luke, Jayleen, and Kelsey as they share letters of encouragement with her. Luke says she’s kind and patient and drew her a poop emoji? Kids don’t have any sort of decorum. Michelle says a child’s opinion can be powerful and I agree, kids don’t hold back. She says she has an important assignment for them and that the men will be caught off guard.
The kids then head to see the men and tell them they’re planning the dates for the week. I love this. Usually, we just get these kids on trivia-type dates, but letting them run wild in the men’s living quarters was brilliant!
The kids begin asking questions to “find out who the bad guys are, and who the good guys are.” They are asking silly questions of the men and trying to figure out who might be a good fit for Michelle.
I especially loved that these kids got their own ITMs. Kids keep it more real than any adult ever could, so to get them on camera with the guys and in interviews with producers is amazing.
Kelsey says she doesn’t like Martin because he’s trying to show off and she says he wears too much cologne.
Ahmed asks if Rodney has shaved his nipples and admits HE HAS! I honestly didn’t really know that was a thing. Rodney’s go to must be to make handshakes because he and Ahmed make one.
Luke says Clayton would be great husband material because he has muscles to carry groceries and he builds good forts, you know, very important husband stuff.
After spending some time with the men, Michelle’s students get to pick their favorite for the date later that night and they pick…Clayton 😒. Serious question, what are the odds the producers pushed the kids in the director of Clayton? If they can persuade grown adults, convincing kids is quite literally childs play.
Clayton’s Bachelor Audition
Michelle is waiting outside of a limo for her date. She doesn’t even know who it is because she trusted her fifth graders to make the choice for her. She seems excited that it’s Clayton and Clayton seems really excited to see her.
Clayton and Michelle are headed to a museum, which is honestly a great date. I love a museum date (I actually just went on one a few days ago!). It’s quietly a dream of mine to get to explore a museum after hours.
They play tag and hang out in the exhibits, we get Clayton dancing and he lowkey looks like he’s on beat.
It was during this date that I realized Clayton is so fucking big, I don’t think we’ve spent enough time on this previously. Nayte is tall, but this man is large, like a literal steak. Wow.
They catch fake butterflies with questions attached to them. This activity allows them to get to know one another, but it really feels too little too late.
They head to the planetarium and the voiceover from the students refers to them as Ms. Young and future Mr. Young, love that. We’ve evolved, we are new women, the men take our names. We own them (I’m kidding about that last part—kinda).
Michelle and Clayton kiss in the planetarium and Clayton says Michelle could be the one, which seems really abrupt and out of nowhere. We haven’t seen them together nearly enough. It made me wonder if these two had more moments together we just didn’t see. It doesn’t really matter because, despite the cute date, we know Clayton is not Michelle’s man, but he’ll be somebody’s assuming he found love on his season.
Time for the dinner portion of the night. Clayton says it took him a while to warm up to this environment (so why is he the next bachelor where he will be expected to get engaged in 10 weeks?) and now that he is, he’s ready to go deeper. He mentions that his one-on-one with Michelle puts things into perspective and helped him realize he wants a family and a wife. He tells Michelle he’s spent the last five years trying to be impressive, he got his MBA, he focused on being great at his job and didn’t really let anyone in romantically.
Cut to the house: Joe is pointing out that every one-on-one has resulted in a rose, but that the roses are weighed more heavily now. Martin reminds us that hometowns are next week and that it wouldn’t make sense if Clayton comes back with the rose. He says in ITM that he’s been questioning the way she’s been handing out the roses, which literally does not make sense because Michelle has gotten rid of a ton of shitty dudes quickly. She kept Peter and Chris an extra week, but besides that Martin still being here is the only choice that feels off. In some ways, it doesn’t even matter because we know it’s Nayte or Joe’s to lose.
Back on the date, Michelle talks about her experience on The Bachelor, she said she was determined to be herself and says she’d much rather be single than be in a relationship and feel alone. Throughout their conversation, we’re getting voiceovers of Michelle’s doubting if Clayton is the one for her and if he should get the rose.
She says that Clayton has all the qualities she’s looking for in a man, but that she knows that giving out a rose means she’s ready to meet his family, but she isn’t ready for that. She tells him it doesn’t mean that he’s not enough, it’s about following her heart. Not Michelle building up this man as she’s breaking up with him. We don’t deserve this woman. And y’all want to call her boring.
Next, Clayton gets an entire segment about him finding love in the future. He hugs the kids one more time, which is weird? Then sits and reads letters from them before completely losing it and bawling to the camera. We’re supposed to believe letters from 11-year-old strangers are what convinced this man that it’s time for him to fight for a family/find his wife? Clayton, we’re the same age, it’s fine if you haven’t found her yet bro, it’s literally fine. Try moving out of mid-Missouri, that was a great start for me. This entire segment was bullshit. Literal minutes were wasted on building Clayton up to be our next Bachelor. I’m sure this was in response to people complaining about not knowing Katie, or feeling like she deserved it, but I personally feel like this was not the move. Pick your cookie-cutter white man and stand behind the decision. Don’t force us to sit through this weird segment. If I pretend for a minute that this show is actually about finding love and seeing unlikely, our unbelievable love stories, what is unlikely and surprising about a white FOOTBALL PLAYER from middle America finding love? I went to school with Clayton, that story is easy to believe! I saw it every semester!
Clearly, Joe knows How to Handle Teats
On the date: Rick, Rodney, Nayte, Joe, Martin, Olu
The date card for this last group date of the season said “Love is Messy.”
Michelle’s kids planned a farm date, which might be proof that they don’t rock with her for real because what the fuck? Rodney looks like he’s going to shit himself and as he prepares to milk the cows, he lets us know he doesn’t even drink dairy milk.
The men are milking the cows and Rick is good at it, which just makes sense to me. Rodney is bad at it, which also makes sense to me. He’s literally sweating milking this cow. Martin clearly does not do manual labor (relatable). Joe and Nayte go head to head in milking the cow and Joe wins.
Next, they’re feeding calfs. The baby cows are taking a liking to Joe, I guess similar to kids, cows also have a great sense of judgment.
We’re moving on to churning butter, these men are working for hometown date roses. Joe is basically the only one who actually made butter, maybe it’s the Minnesotan advantage?
Finally, these guys have to shovel cow shit. Which is just sick. Nayte hurts his back, which is proof that he might just be tall and not really good at any sort of physical activity. He wasn’t lifting with his legs. C’mon Nayte, I know you lift weights, you should know better.
Rick plans to be vulnerable as they head into the nighttime portion of the last group date of the season.
Michelle encourages the men to share what they need to share, ask questions and get clarity on what they need.
Nayte sits down with her and says they haven’t touched too much on his family because his dad told him to never talk to him about girls, or bring anyone home, but we don’t hear why. I mean, this is a weird thing for your parent to say, right? Nayte tells her that she’s the first woman he’s ever wanted to think about bringing home and then he tells her he’s falling for her and Michelle says she feels it too. At this point, I am probably just being pessimistic, but I don’t get how Nayte has given us so little but is clearly going to make it so far. He gives very little emotionally and I think Michelle is blinded by the chemistry. I can’t blame her, look at the material.
Joe is next and tells Michelle that his grandparents ran a dairy farm and so he was right at home on the date, what are the odds? That’s why he was so good on the date! Joe ends his time with Michelle sharing that family is important to him and he loves the traditions his family had growing up. It’s why he wants a family of his own. He doesn’t say anything about how he feels about Michelle though.
Now we see Martin talking to Rick about the miscommunication he and Michelle have been experiencing. Martin chalks it up to Michelle not listening and this makes him question who Michelle really is. Like most of what’s come out of his mouth during the season, he wasn’t making any sense. Olu is making faces that basically say “dude what the fuck is wrong with you?”
Martin continues to talk shit about Michelle and says the poem she performed earlier in the season is an example of her not dealing with her issues which makes her seem immature. This is a rude thing to say in general, but especially to a Black woman who has actually communicated very clearly and effectively this entire season. Perhaps Martin should go to therapy and unpack what his deal is with shit-talking constantly and being so bothered by women who are high maintenance.
Michelle and Martin sit together and he makes no real mention of their previous miscommunications, instead, he says he can’t wait for her to meet his family and friends. Michelle asks what his friends would call his biggest flaw and Martin says it would be that he’s brutally honest. Here’s the thing, no he isn’t. Every time he’s been confronted, he backpedals, or acts confused, or claims that Michelle isn’t listening. He has no self-awareness, nor does he know to admit when he’s wrong, as proof from the IG post he put up after he was sent home tonight. Grow the fuck up Martin. I get legit concerned for people who see themselves on TV and see nothing wrong with their behavior.
Olu uses his time to speak about Martin. Normally I’d be very against this, but I think he entered the conversation with good intentions and communicated it well. He showed true care and concern for Michelle. He shares what Martin said about her poem and says that Martin’s remarks make it clear that he’s never dealt with these issues. Olu is absolutely right. Earlier in the season, Michelle said something she’s struggled with in romantic relationships is dating partners that didn’t really see her, or understand/empathize with her experience as a Black woman. Martin calling Michelle immature based on what she shared in that poem just proves that he’d be more of the same as what she’s already dated. Bullet dodged. I do wish Olu would have spun it at least a little bit to make it about his and Michelle’s relationship, but I’m really glad he spoke up and looked out for her. If you’re going to “tattle” this is how you do it.
Michelle grabs Martin and shares what she knows. Martin denies using the word immature and asks if he can share what he actually said (even though immature is exactly the word he used). Martin says some bullshit about there being a difference between having insecurities and being insecure.
He keeps interrupting her and tries to call her “my love,” but Michelle shuts that down real quick and asks him again what he said about her behind her back. Martin dodges the question and throws it back on her saying she’s letting other people dictate their relationship. He then interrupts her, again. Martin gives a fake ass apology saying he might have spoken over her. Yikes, he sucks. Michelle basically says it doesn’t matter what else comes out of his mouth, he keeps interrupting her, he’s not being honest, she doesn’t trust him and so he’s got to go home. Martin looks shocked when she says this. Again, no self-awareness.
Martin gets into the car and says Michelle is making a mistake and that a woman like that doesn’t deserve his time. Martin had too many chances to check himself and not say some of the shit he did throughout the season, or at least say it to Michelle’s face, so him getting sent home was on him.
Nayte gets the group date rose, likely for being the only one to say he’s falling for her. I actually worry that Joe not saying something similar will not bode well for him in the future.
Before leaving the group date, Michelle hugs Olu and thanks him for having her back. I’m starting to think we haven’t seen much of Olu because their conversations have read too much like a friendship. There is often one person on each season that makes it pretty far not because of a romantic connection, but because the lead and this person have built a solid friendship and they are someone the lead can trust.
Meet the Parents
I was so excited for Brandon and this date. He’s just happy to be alive and to be doing anything with Michelle one-on-one. He’s cheesing so hard.
They go get ice cream at a place called Nelson’s, my kind of summer date.
I realized Brandon opens her car door for her, which I really like. I feel like men don’t do that often now. They pull up to Michelle’s house and Brandon gets nervous that her parents will be there, but they aren’t home, allegedly.
As he walks through the house he says he’s literally walking through her heart, which I thought was so sweet. They sit on the bed and Brandon notes that it’s a full-circle moment because he rolled up at the beginning of the season on a bed.
Michelle and Brandon decide to take a dip in the pool and they do this weird bit where she says he can wear her dad’s swim trunks as long as he doesn’t tell him, which makes no sense because 1) this is being filmed, he’s going to see and 2) did production really not set Brandon up with swim trunks? They’re in Minnesota, I know there are Targets everywhere.
Of course, Michelle’s parents show up while they’re making out in the hot tub. Why are they in the hot tub, by the way? Minnesota summers aren’t scorching, but it’s still summer, who’s sitting in a jacuzzi during the daytime in the summer? Am I wrong here? I’ve literally never sat in a jacuzzi during the daytime, especially not in the summer.
They dry off and spend some time sitting down with Michelle’s parents. Michelle’s dad does this fake hug thing Black dads do to men they haven’t really seen/met/heard of before, so I thought that was funny. They ask the typical questions, why they gravitated towards one another, do they want kids, etc. Brandon asks Michelle’s parents for advice about making their marriage last. I love what Michelle’s mom said about them being best friends first. Being best friends in my opinion is such a great foundation to start a relationship from.
Brandon asks for a moment to talk to Michelle’s parents alone and at this moment I knew he was going to ask for their blessing. Brandon says he’s an old soul and wants to spend his life with Michelle, but didn’t want to take that next step without their blessing.
I know people hate that this show forces this permission-giving of sorts and I too normally hate it when the lead asks all three parents, especially when they only ask the dads as if daughters are property. I liked the way Brandon did this though and I thought Michelle’s parents gave a great answer. I believed her parents when they said they trust Michelle’s judgment and so if she chooses him, they’ll support that.
Heading into dinner, Michelle says she could see a life with Brandon in Minneapolis. Brandon says he loved spending the day with her, meeting her parents, and says he's feeling the best he has so far. This is always such a tough part of the season for me, you can start to see one or two men that really see it with the lead, and I get sad just knowing that it likely won’t be this person who is catching feelings.
Michelle asks who she’d be meeting at hometowns, Brandon says his mom, dad, and brother, would be meeting Michelle. He also shares that he’d love to introduce Michelle to his grandpa, but he’s passed. His grandpa was his best friend and taught him a lot about relationships and friendships. Brandon wanted him to meet the person he ended up with so badly and I let a little thug tear fall. I feel this way about my grandmas and I don’t take for granted that I still have them in my life.
Next, Brandon gifts Michelle a bracelet that his mom gave him before leaving for the show. His mom said if he truly feels Michelle is the one, then to give her the bracelet so they can give her the same love they gave Brandon. Michelle seems genuinely touched by this.
Brandon says he’s falling in love with her and we all knew that already. This man is whipped. I feel like I saw their chemistry in this date more than I have in the past episodes. I felt like before I was looking at a boy infatuated with a woman, but this felt like two people who really have a lot of love to give and want to give it to one another.
Michelle says she could see Brandon being her best friend and that she would love to meet his family. He gets the date rose and is headed to hometowns!
The Final Four
Obviously, Michelle cancels the cocktail party, the men are surprised, but I don’t know why. We’re talking about meeting the family in two days, nothing discussed in a two-hour cocktail party would change her mind. We’re talking about her narrowing down these men to find her husband. She been knew who was getting those roses.
Sidenote: is it just me or have we gotten less and less of Kaitlyn and Tayshia the last few weeks? I get that if the lead has fewer breakdowns, you likely need your hosts less, but it’s been weird how much we haven’t seen them. It almost feels like they’ve been edited out intentionally.
As the men line up, Michelle says this is the hardest decision she’s made in her journey so far, but by giving a rose she is ready and excited to meet their families and by them accepting the rose, it means they are willing to welcome her in. Of course, Joe gets the first rose, Rodney gets the second rose. I was surprised by this, but also love this for Rodney! I thought for sure it was going to Rick.
Michelle’s final four are Nayte, Joe, Brandon, and Rodney, which means that for the first time in Bachelorette history, the final four are all Black men. We’re going to see four Black (well, interracial) hometowns, how exciting! This is also just another moment of me side-eyeing the producers and casting because this final four means they had three Black men to choose from for Bachelor, but chose Clayton and choose him well before they finished filming Michelle’s season too. It’s not like they shot her students writing every man who went home love letters.
We see some heartfelt goodbyes to Olu and Rick and they both wish her well.
Michelle gathers her final four and says that family is everything to her and she’s looking forward to getting to know these men more through meeting their families.
Next week, it looks like they might actually be traveling to hometowns? We get some momma tears, Nayte tears, siblings questioning the process and again someone’s daddy saying their son isn’t ready for marriage.
The hometown episode is always my favorite, so I’m looking forward to it!
I’ve admired the way Michelle has dismissed the jerks from her season, but I didn’t think about the weight she feels when handling those interactions. Thank you for pointing that out.
I still don’t understand why Clayton is the next Bachelor. Olu or any of the final four men would be so much better.