Cruise Ships and Lying Lips: Bachelorette(s) 19, Episode 4
Will Bachelor Nation single handedly make cruises a thing again?
This episode, we are in the city of love! I’ve dreamed of Paris for most of my life, so it was nice to live vicariously through this group.
We start off at Bachelor Mansion where the men are asking one another who is officially on team Gabby vs. team Rachel. They’re also discussing Hayden’s use of the phrase “rough around the edges.”
Personally, I was surprised Hayden knew that’s where he went wrong. In the midst of admitting he shouldn’t have used that phrase to describe Gabby, he also blames her for his use of the phrase. He says it forced him to use it as well and calls her a bitch in the process.
This was the first of many moments that Hayden’s stupidity was on display. It’s not news that people can use words to describe themselves, but not want others to use those same words. Hayden continues to speak out the side of his neck saying that Rachel and Gabby don’t hold a candle to his ex and that there is no way he’s thinking about marrying either of these women.
Jesse comes in and interrupts Hayden’s tirade to let the men know that two of them will be joining Rachel and Gabby in Paris, while the rest of them are headed to some undisclosed location in France (which we later find out is a nasty boat—more on this later).
Gabby and Rachel are in Paris recapping last week. Rachel is still hurting from having her roses rejected several times. She says she felt like no one wanted to date her and there was no purpose for her being there. She was also embarrassed and said the process of having two Bachelorettes automatically allows comparison to happen between the two of them. This is true, most of us have been doing it as well. Whether it’s right or not, it’s hard not to when they’re both on screen together and they keep saying “our journey.”
The men meet Jesse in the port city of Le Havre, France where he lets them know they will be spending the rest of their journey on a Virgin cruise ship, some idiot calls it a yacht in a voice-over. We get a bunch of shots of this beautiful boat, but no matter how much they try to sell this ship to me, I am not into it.
I’ve been on exactly one cruise and it was the worst trip I’ve ever been on. I’m not one for motion sickness, but I had a headache and felt nauseous the entire time. So, I cannot personally recommend cruise ships. It’s also a wild choice given the fact that the cruising industry had terrible marketing throughout the thickest parts of the pandemic. But, ABC has a show to make and I’m assuming Virgin cruise ships were willing to offer up a ship from their fleet for cheap (cheap meaning still more money than I’ve ever seen, but you get it).
The One-on-One Dates
I hated the way they edited these dates going back and forth between the two, it felt disjointed. So, I’m not going to write my recap the way they edited it and instead focus on Rachel’s date first, then Gabby’s.
Rachel chose Tino to spend the day with her in Paris. The two look like they are meant to be together. Rachel seemed comfortable and she was even able to joke with him a bit.
They walk around rainy Paris and end up at a crepe shop where they taste and make crepes. Rachel is giving Tino the same type of sex eyes she gave Clayton. I like them together.
The couples meet up at a cafe and Rachel and Gabby sneak off to dish on how their day dates were. Rachel is crushing hard, she says it’s the Paris effect, but sis had big heart eyes from Tino on night one. It’s cute to see that her original assumptions about him are turning out to be right.
During the nighttime portion, Rachel goes in with the intention to only hand out roses to men she could see being her husband. Tino checks in with Rachel about the difficult rose ceremony she experienced last week, which I thought was a nice gesture.
She spoke honestly about it making her feel insecure, but then switched the conversation to talking about family and career. She shares a story we’ve heard before about her previous partner not trusting her because her career as a pilot caused her to be gone a lot. As a contractor (I think that’s what he does?) Tino shares that he understands and can relate to her fears of how to manage a family, and kids with demanding careers.
I feel like we saw a different side of Rachel tonight, she was asking intentional questions to see if their lives fit together, but she was also being vulnerable in sharing her feelings for Tino. She seemed so confident in her vulnerability. This date actually felt like she was in charge. Love to see it after last week. Tino gets the date rose and Rachel says it was the reset she needed.
Gabby said it best: Jason is a man of very few words. He is very low energy and at first, I was going to flame him for that, but by the end of the date, I felt like Jason came out of his shell a bit. The pair went to a hat shop to try on berets.
While it is clear that they both connect physically, Gabby was a little worried that they didn’t get to know one another enough, she goes into the nighttime portion hoping that they’ll have a chance to connect.
Jason says he’s a pretty private guy—who somehow agreed to go on one of the biggest television dating shows. He says his privacy comes from his childhood, feeling like he was never as good as his friends, so it takes him a bit to open up because he takes things personally and so he’s slow to trust. He also says he’s worked on being more vulnerable and speaking up through therapy, which we love to hear!
Gabby relates to Jason’s story by sharing her relationship with her mother. I love how Jason showed up for her, listened to her, and showed empathy. They even bonded over the concept of healing their inner children (side note: I’m working on this right now in therapy and WHEW, it’s tough). You can tell Gabby feels seen and heard when giving him the rose. I love that both of these women are getting the validation and support they deserve (and didn’t get last week). Gabby gives Jason the date rose and he accepts.
Love Conquers All, But Not Without a Fight
On the date: Nate, Kirk, Quincey, Erich, Michael, Mark, Spencer, John
This is Gabby’s first solo group date and the men are learning french boxing. The men will go head to head in the ring and are expected to share why they are Gabby’s perfect match. The winner gets a one-on-one dinner with Gabby. I couldn’t help, but notice the way Nate was looking at Gabby as the date was being explained. It was really cute.
The men are suited up to fight, Rachel’s men are in the crowd, and we get a quick moment of Logan mentioning that he’s still thinking about Gabby.
Before fighting, the men profess their love for Gabby and it’s a weird way to start a boxing match, but ok. Of course, we get another comparison moment. Rachel can’t help, but notice in the midst of Gabby’s men sharing their feelings, none of her men are acknowledging her. Rachel says it feels like no one cares. She feels rejected.
At this point, I am convinced producers are encouraging these men to pull back at certain times to amplify the insecurities these women are already feeling. I have no proof of this, but this show is beyond messy and I wouldn’t put it past production. What do y’all think?
We barely see the fights, but Spencer wins the champion belt for the day and earns himself dinner with Gabby.
At dinner, Spencer and Gabby bond over being in military families. He served in the military and had a good experience during his service—no comment. That’s pretty much all we get from these two. Either Spencer doesn’t make it very far, or the drama we get next beats out whatever else Gabby and Spencer talked about.
While Gabby is on her date, Rachel continues to spiral. She says she doesn’t want to beg for attention, she wants to know the men want to be there and want to pursue her. Rachel goes as far as to say that she felt more considered and noticed as a contestant on Clayton’s season than she does as the bachelorette and that is tough.
She decides to go talk to her men and when she meets them, they can tell she’s been crying. We get this vulnerable moment of her saying how the men made her feel during Gabby’s date. She reminds the men that little moments matter and she wants these men to want to give her those little moments. Sounds similar to Michelle’s needs from her season.
Rachel doesn’t give the guys a chance to respond—which I loved. The men look dumbfounded. I don’t want to blame everything on age, but Rachel’s group is definitely younger and less experienced.
The Art of Romance
On the date: Tyler, Zach, Ethan, Meatball, Logan, Jordan, Hayden, Aven
Rachel is in yet another awful dress, what is going on Ms. Recchia, why these dresses?
We get another comment from Logan about making sure that pursuing Rachel makes sense and that they connect.
The men are meeting with Flora and Boris, romance experts who take them through a series of tests to learn how to romance Rachel. The first task the men are given is to flirt and they all bomb, badly. Next, they had to french kiss their own fists, it was disgusting. Finally, Rachel had to sniff each of their armpits. Absolutely not.
To end the date, the men wrote love letters to Rachel and read them out loud, this was somehow the most normal part of the date. As the group date ends, Logan shares in his ITM that he didn’t feel a spark with Rachel and he walked away from the group date thinking about Gabby. Logan, this ain’t gonna end well for you buddy.
Teddy bear Tyler wins one-on-one time with Rachel. He’s so adorable. He literally looks like the human version of my dog and so when I see him, all I can think about is my little pup.
During their time together, Tyler shares a previous difficult breakup he had. He bought a house for himself and his former partner and it didn’t end up working out. I’m not gonna lie, this story is sus. Tyler seems like he loves hard and he loves the feeling of being in love. He’s giving hopeless romantic, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. I get the feeling that he wants a wife, kids, a house, and a puppy that looks just like him to come home to. I’m not convinced that he cares too much about who it is with as long as they love him too. Tyler gets the rose.
Logan and Jesse are sitting at a bar talking about his feelings for Gabby. He says he hasn’t stopped thinking about her. Logan is worried about piling on to the rejection Rachel has already experienced, but if Gabby is feeling him, he wants a chance to pursue her.
Cocktail Party
Both women are in good spirits going into the night. Rachel sits with Hayden and he shares the story of his dog Rambo who is sick with a brain tumor and has a few months to live. He shares it as a reminder that he’s truly there for her knowing that each week he gives Rachel is less time he gets with Rambo. She thanks him for sharing and leaves to spend time with Tino.
I want to feel bad for Hayden, but his rude response to Rachel leaving makes it hard. Personally, I wouldn’t leave my pup for this dumb show. I shed tears going on work trips without my dog. Still, Hayden could have expressed his hurt to the guys and even to Rachel without insulting her. His mistake is not that he feels some type of way that Rachel cut their conversation short, his mistake is that he insulted her instead of leading with how her actions made him feel. Your partner is going to piss you off, this is a fact, how you handle and communicate being hurt, its important. Hayden’s reaction ain’t cut it for me, or Rachel.
After hearing Hayden say one too many rude things about Rachel and Gabby, Meatball takes it upon himself to share with Rachel what he’s has been saying. Rachel thanks Meatball for sharing and immediately goes to get Hayden. She literally walks in on him talking shit!
Rachel pulls Hayden to the side and she asks if he knows why they’re talking. He says they are there to talk about Rambo and Rachel is shocked that he could be so tone deaf. Rachel begins sharing the comments she’s heard he’s been saying. He denies all of it. Saying “I don’t speak like that, that’s not my character.” Remember y’all, he’s a southern gentleman, he would never talk that way about a woman. *cuts to shot after shot of him talking shit.* Rachel sends Hayden home and he uses his entire exit speech to talk about Rambo. Boy, bye!
This experience is clearly getting to Rachel. On top of the rude men and rejection she’s dealing with, she compares her journey to Gabby’s, and from the outside looking in, it looks like Gabby is having a great time.
After a tough night for Rachel, the women decide to cancel the rest of the cocktail party. Logan is shook because he didn’t get time to share how he was feeling with Gabby or Rachel.
Rose Ceremony
I don’t like this format of making the men go into separate rooms after accepting the rose. It doesn’t do much for the show, it doesn’t move the story forward. So much of the two bachelorette format is confusing. It could have been avoided if producers just did some voice overs or ITMs with the women or Jesse explaining the process. Instead, everyone is confused.
Logan’s name is called last and he accepts Rachel’s rose, knowing he ain’t feeling her. He’s saying there’s still hope and still time as if half the premise of this show isn’t about there not being enough time.
Gabby’s Roses: Nate, Jason, Erich, Johnny, Michael, Spencer, Mario
Rachel’s Roses: Tino, Aven, Tyler, Meatball, Zach, Ethan, Logan
Next week the group is in Bruges, Belgium. Rachel has several steamy makeouts, Logan is spiraling because of his feelings for Gabby and Rachel says she wants to quit (again).
I really hope we start to see these women having more fun. We’re about a third of the way through the season and so much of it has been plagued by tears. As a viewer and as a person who wants these women to win and have a good experience, I hope it gets better because right now, it’s not looking good.
Hilarious as always. I also wondered if the producers were interfering with Rachel or her guys during the boxing date.