Hometowns: Bachelorette(s) 19, Episode 7
It is time to switch up the not so tried and true formula of this show.
Listen, I know this show does not even so much as dabble in reality. It’s pure fantasy. Of course, it’s normal to date 30 people at once. What do you mean everyone doesn’t take a helicopter ride along the Almalfi Coast on their second date? I guess that’s sort of the appeal. While most of us wouldn’t choose to date like this, it is fun to watch the drama and heartache that comes with dating like this. In yet, this hometown episode more than others felt like it was setting these women up for failure.
I understand the premise of the show is to get engaged at the end, but why don’t more of these leads just focus on finding a person who has the qualities they’d want in a long-term partner? Why is the show so afraid to switch it up? Why is an engagement/marriage the only thing that equates to a successful relationship?
When I think about this show from a producer’s perspective, I can’t help, but wonder, what exactly is the goal for them? None of these guys are truly likable enough to be Bachelor, I don’t care too much about seeing most of them in Paradise, and like I said last week, they’re mostly boring/too normal, and I don’t see it working with any of these men long term. In fact, these women don’t even look happy in the interviews I’ve seen of them post-filming.
The point is, something has got to change. I enjoy watching the show and recapping it, but at this point, Paradise is the strongest show of the franchise (in my humble opinion). While there is still this unrealistic expectation that couples will walk away engaged, the success rate is higher. The double Bachelorette season was created to switch up the formula a bit, but it’s been poorly executed and overall left me underwhelmed and I don’t think the women or contestants are to blame. To me, this falls squarely on production.
Anyway, on to the recap!
Let the Good Times Roll!
We are leaving the COVID cruise ship, but not before getting more gratuitous footage of this damn vessel. Both women are nervous, they realize family plays a big role in the relationship and indeed it does.
I cannot believe that quiet, reserved Jason is from New Orleans. I feel like everyone I’ve met from New Orleans is loud and lively in the best way and it was so nice to see NOLA bring out a side of Jason that we have yet to see from him yet. He seems so comfortable with Gabby.
We learn that Jason was ready to leave at the beginning of the process, which I’d wondered if that’s how he felt when he shared in their first one-on-one that the process was a lot for him.
We meet Jason’s dad and he immediately starts crying, I love it. Sometimes during these hometowns, you can see when the parent and children are truly close and have this genuine like for one another, not just love, but like. Jason’s dad really likes his son as much as he loves him. He says Jason looks happy and at ease and is overall just really supportive of the process and whatever decision Jason chooses to make.
The couple spends the evening meeting his mother, sister, and his sister’s boyfriend.
Gabby looked so comfortable with his family. She sits down with his sister and immediately says “What dirt do you want on Jason?” That comfortability to joke with one another is so special.
During her time with Jason’s family, Gabby seems to be projecting a bit. She asks his sister and mom if she thinks they’re a good match because they’re so different. Jason is more reserved and Gabby is so out there and silly. Both of them seemed confident that Gabby and Jason would be great together and seemed excited about the possibility of Gabby joining their family long-term.
When sitting with his mom, Jason shared that he cannot see himself getting engaged because the timeline isn’t realistic. He’s a processor and needs space to process. He assures his mom that it isn’t Gabby, it’s him. She reminds him that he needs to share those feelings with her as well. It didn’t surprise me at all that Jason would say he isn’t ready to be engaged in two weeks, even if it is Gabby. Everything about Jason’s demeanor points to the fact that he doesn’t do anything lightly. So of course he’s not going to rush into a proposal.
I love Jason for Gabby. They seem equally yolked, they are a great balance to one another and there is a maturity to their interactions that makes it seem like they’ve known one another for a while. Still, I don’t think she picks him.
Zach Attack
Everyone else, pack it up because Zach just planned the best hometown date we’ve ever seen. First, there’s a callback to the bikes they rode in Amsterdam, then they climb on top of a building where they see planes taking off, a memory they both share from childhood and bonded over during their first one-on-one date. It was really cute 🥺.
Zach is also casually related to Patrick Warburton. I know him as Joe Swanson from Family Guy. He was just there at Zach’s hometown talking to Rachel about being a pilot. It was wild.
When Rachel goes and sits with Zach’s dad, I noticed he said that Zach was looking for love and his best friend. He wants to be married and in a committed relationship and we don’t hear that often from parents talking about their sons. Usually, there’s this concern of if their son is ready, or there yet, but his dad was so confident in Zach being ready for commitment.
Zach’s parents say it’s clear that their son is very into Rachel, which is reassuring. At the end of the night, the family watched a recording of Zach and Rachel’s dates throughout the process. Rachel fit right in and his family really loved her. Zach said it was unanimous and his dad called Rachel Zach’s future wife.
Johnny
Gabby says it all going into her date with Johnny, he’s super hot. That is about it. Johnny needs a smooth three years of therapy before he commits to anyone.
It also needs to be said that Johnny’s mom is fine, freaking gorgeous. Besides that, I was not invested in this hometown. Let us be serious, they are not serious. Johnny is that guy you date before you find the one. He’s good-looking, too cool, and the chemistry is great, but after a year or two, you are ready to settle down, and he’s not. So, you go your separate ways. Even when Gabby asked his mom if Johnny was ready for a long-term relationship, she didn’t quite answer.
When Johnny sits with his mom he shares that he’s not sure he’s fully ready yet, a totally fine and normal place to be, but unfortunately not on this show. I love the perspective his dad brought to the situation. Sometimes it’s not about being ready, it’s about being able to talk openly and honestly and figure things out together. However, Johnny has to feel confident and sure in his choice and he just isn’t at the moment.
G.T.L. (Gym. Tyler. Laundry.)
We are at the Jersey Shore!
Rachel says when you bring families into the mix it changes things, and it is absolutely true. She then quasi complains about being further behind with Tyler than she is in her other relationships. But she chose to give her last one-on-one to Zach, who’d already gotten a one-on-one. That was a choice baby girl (albeit potentially a producer choice).
The couple has the entire boardwalk to themselves, which is essentially free advertising for all the boardwalk games Tyler owns. In fact, I’m proud of him for referencing the fact that he owns carnival games on the boardwalk. Get that money Tyler!
He is gushing about Rachel in his ITMs, he loves how emotional she is and how she’s unafraid to wear her heart on her sleeve. He then basically introduces her to everyone on the damn boardwalk, cousins, play uncles, and childhood besties. At this point, it’s setting in that Rachel hasn’t had enough time with Tyler to make the type of decisions one should be ready to make at this point (at least on this show). Honestly, Rachel is a bozo 🤡 for this one. She could’ve made the same move as Gabby and only taken three men to hometowns, instead she dragged her ass to the Jersey Shore knowing damn well it didn’t make any sense.
While I do not think Tyler is her guy, I can appreciate how he’s seemed to give a lot of himself to this process. I said in an early recap that he clearly loves love and so all the feelings he’s gushing about are likely more of him loving the idea of Rachel, and the idea of being in love with Rachel.
I don’t like that Rachel is comparing the hometowns though. First impressions matter, but they aren’t everything, and if this show wasn’t so fucking hung up on proposals and marriages that do not last, maybe Rachel would have been okay meeting Tyler’s family.
As Rachel sits down and tries to end things with Tyler, he cuts her off AND STARTS TELLING HER HOW GREAT SHE IS. Y’all, I was literally screaming at my TV because Rachel is so clearly trying to break up with him, but Tyler is hell-bent on telling her he’s in love with her. How fucking awkward.
As if that wasn’t awkward enough, we get footage of his family betting how much Tyler is in love. He walks in by himself and has to tell them that they won’t be meeting Rachel. More awkwardness ensues and Tyler tries to muster up some tears.
Mullet Man (Erich)
As we are starting Erich’s date, we find out his dad is battling cancer (what the fuck why are we just now hearing this?). Erich’s dad has terminal cancer and they aren’t sure how long he has to live. But, it was really important to Erich that Gabby meets him, so that’s what she’s doing.
Gabby and Erich’s dad bond over being involved in the healthcare system in different ways. Gabby is an ICU nurse and Erich’s dad has a special appreciation for nurses since they are a big part of his chemo treatment.
I don’t know y’all, there are some things that have to be sacred and this felt like one of those moments. I love the drama that hometowns bring, but it’s clear that Erich’s dad is in rough shape and that it’s taking a toll on everyone, especially his mom.
His mom uses her time with Erich to remind him how sacred marriage is and that it’s for life (it doesn’t have to be—but whatever). I feel like this moment was her way of reminding him he doesn’t have to rush into anything. During Gabby’s time with Erich’s mom, she reminds her of the same thing. She says her family takes commitment really seriously, that’s why she and Erich’s dad have been together for 35 years.
At night, the couple heads to a local bar and I couldn’t help, but notice that Erich was drinking a dirty martini with lots of olives. I always love peeping person’s cocktail of choice.
Anyway, these two just want to bone. Erich says he thinks he’s falling in love with her and maybe that’s true, but more than anything it’s clear that these two want to bone. Gabby says it back. So Erich is probably winning. They’ve been giving one another that look since their first date. Love that for them, want that for them, hope they have a rockin’ time at fantasy suites.
Gabby is gushing about how amazing the day was, she says his hometown could change the rest of her life and if that’s true, why aren’t we seeing it!?! Sure, we’ve seen them steal kisses and have a few hot makeouts all season, but we haven’t seen them talk about anything. We didn’t even know Erich’s dad had terminal cancer even though he told us in this episode that they talked about it! Where is that footage? Why does something like that end up on the cutting room floor? What else has Erich (and these other men) shared with Gabby that we know nothing about? Again, the production choices this season have been wild.
A Double Dose of Skepticism
Rachel ain’t seen Tino for more than 30 seconds before she starts talking about being nervous about his family liking her. He says she has nothing to worry about and that is wrong.
We immediately cut to his family questioning how real this all could be, especially since she is dating multiple men. Tino and Rachel are sitting in his parent’s house, going through their time on the show together, gushing about the moments they’ve had and Tino’s dad is immediately suspicious and not with the shits. He’s skeptical and doubts how ready they could be to be in a committed relationship with one another after two months. His questions are fair, cruises to Amsterdam do not a successful marriage make.
His parents are really hitting hard that this experience isn’t real, they’re hyper-focused on the timeline and worried about how true the connection is. They also kept asking how much time (in minutes, I’m assuming) they’ve spent together and it’s not lost on me that the question is never answered.
At the end of the day, I don’t think it’s the dating multiple people that have his parents and others hung up, it’s the expectation of an engagement/marriage at the end of it. Which goes back to what I said at the beginning of this, maybe the show needs to do some soul searching about other ways a season can end that aren’t an engagement that will inevitably fail 6-9 months later.
I did feel like his parents were a little harsh on Rachel. His dad insinuated that she might just be participating in this process to get married and that’s such an unfair assertion. If their entire point is that she hasn’t spent enough time to get to know Tino, surely sitting down one evening isn’t enough time for them to get to know her either or her intentions. It’d be fair to say she’s there for Instagram followers, or to get a leg up on her career (she did Tweet at United and ask for a job after all) but it was super unfair for them to assume she just liked the idea of being married and not the commitment of it.
You can have your guard up and be skeptical without being disrespectful. And it was wild to me that Tino left the night thinking they “adored” her. His family certainly did not adore her. I wouldn’t even say they were cautiously optimistic about her.
Despite where Tino’s parents’ outlook on the process, at the end of the date, he shares that he’s falling in love with her and he apologizes for not saying it sooner becuase he’s been feeling it for a while. Rachel says it back and they makeout, which is fucking wild because despite how they’re feeling, his family still doesn’t not fuck with any of this.
To be on brand with the other awful production and editing decisions of this season, the episode ends randomly. We watch Rachel drive away from Tino and then get a preview of the weeks to come. Aven’s date is shoehorned into the Men Tell All where Meatball is once again dumping sauce on himself. There’s also apparently some huge announcement that was made at the MTA taping and part of me wants to sleuth around the internet for it, but I don’t want to get spoiled on the rest of the season.
Finally, we get a preview of Fantasy Suite Week. Everyone is in Mexico, Rachel is bringing up that this is when their journey with Clayton went downhill, and she is still feeling some type of way after her hometown with Tino. Finally, it looks like Erich is sharing that he does not want Gabby to be intimate with multiple men during the week if he’s her final choice (not this again 🙄). Whew seems like a lot of mess is left in these last few episodes. Can’t wait to watch it all unfold and see if our bestie bachelorettes remain that way. Until next week, ✌🏾.
According to Reddit, your take on Jason is correct. He is supposedly from Memphis, but the producers thought NO would be a better place for filming. (I’m offended for Memphis - that city has some beautiful places, especially if they were going to show just 5 minutes of Jason’s city.)