We Made It to the End: Bachelorette(s) 19, Episode 12
And we only got half the amount of sponsored content this time!
I’m not even gonna hold y’all, I don’t think I’ve ever been happier to see a season end. I didn’t care for Katie as a person, but at least she gave us a little razzle dazzle, a little attitude, I enjoyed recapping her season (the first one I ever recapped). But this season, it dragged on at a certain point. We went in with so much hope and excitement. Two dynamic women with real jobs were going to get a second chance at love after cornfed Clayton fucked shit up.
Unfortunately, the pacing and editing has been off since night one. We didn’t get enough time with any of these men, or the leads, the editing choices were confusing at best. Now we’re ending the season with one lead engaged to a man who went on the show knowing their was evidence of him in blackface and evidence that he was dating someone right before the show and the other lead probably traumatized for life because of her final picks fuckery.
If that weren’t enough, Zach, the embodiment of a cold spaghetti noodle, is our new Bachelor. Why? For what reason? Honestly, it’s disrespectful.
In addition to Erich’s blackface, he allegedly was in a relationship before coming on the show. He told his (now ex) that this show wasn’t real and that he was doing it to jumpstart a new career for himself. How’s that working out Erich? Homeboy doesn’t have that many Instagram followers and when you Google this man his name will be linked to blackface and ‘cheating’ for at least the next 12 months.
We begin the episode in an ominous dark studio with a single spotlight on Jesse Palmer. What at first seems like an admittance that they missed the mark on this season quickly turns into a reveal that Tino met a girl before the show which lead to some shady encounters after the show. At this point, I wondered if we were about to watch Tino get villanized for some shit many contestants do before coming on the show. In fact, he did the very thing Erich did too.
We pick up where we left off last week. Gabby is spiraling after hearing that Erich wants to date her before getting engaged. I didn’t recognize this last week, but Gabby seems really drunk in her ITMs and I don’t love that. Nothing wrong with being drunk, go crazy sis, but it felt like production really leaned into that and exploited her a bit. She’s really terrified of losing Erich and knowing all we know about him now, that is so wild.
Rachel’s Heart is With Tino (For Now)
Rachel heads to Tino’s room to share that he’s the only man left and that she chooses him, by default, because she sent her actual man home since he wouldn’t give her a god-awful pear-shaped ring from Neil Lane. When Rachel tells him that, Tino did not look that happy or excited. He looked scared. Not a good sign.
Then we get our first spon con of the night, a Kardashians preview. I still can’t believe Tristan went through the entire surrogacy process with Khloe knowing that he was dicking other women down and more specifically having a baby with another woman. MESS.
Getting Engaged
The women are talking about getting engaged to their final picks and we see Rachel getting ready for her final rose ceremony with Tino. Not only is Rachel’s dress hideous, but Tino is in a basic black suit. WHAT IS GOING ON!? THEY DON’T EVEN LOOK GOOD. It’s like Cary Fetman (Bachelor Nation stylist) subconsciously knew what the future held for these two.
I’m not going to go over a single thing either of them said to one another becuase I don’t care and neither do y’all. Rachel wanted to get engaged. That’s it. She wanted the pomp and circumstance of a proposal, the ring, the perfect white dress, the tears, and long expressions of love. In other words, a fairytale. What I don’t think she cared much about was compatibility, a partnership, or fitting into one another’s lives and so she picked the ending that would give her the momentary fairytale instead of spending her season sussing out who or what her happy ending could look like, whether it included a proposal or not.
I was so sad watching this. Not becuase of how they ended, but because I saw so much of myself in Rachel. The value she felt because a man chose her and because she finally had a ring on her finger. I’ve been there. It was so clear that her world lit up because someone called her pretty and pretended to want to be with her. Tino only ever cared about ‘winning’ and Rachel only cared about living this process engaged and that was their downfall.
During Rachel’s meeting of the family, her mom was obsessed with the idea of her getting engaged and having babies. We didn’t see her ask Rachel’s final two any tough questions, we didn’t see her question Rachel much outside of “does he want kids?” it’s all so sad.
I understand wanting a partner in life and wanting to start a family, but Rachel is a whole pilot and a bad bitch. Fuck that dusty man and this show. Truly.
We’re back in the live studio audience and Rachel is sitting alone talking about how her relationship went south. I liked that she named the normal growing pains couples have when they leave the show because I feel like the final couple often glosses over that (which we see later on). She said they worked through those difficulties until Tino began to talk about past relationships with Rachel and how moving forward had been tough. Eventually, those conversations come to a head and Tino admitted he cheated on her. We get the fallout of that conversation.
First, Gabby arrives at an undisclosed house for moral support. Gabby looks more hurt than Rachel. They’re both shocked about this news. Rachel then shares with Gabby that Tino wasn’t really remorseful when telling her he cheated. Apparently, he told her not to tell anyone and said he wished he never would have told her about it. Excuse me, what? Are you insane? It’s one thing to cheat and realize that maybe the girl you proposed to after a few months of knowing her isn’t your forever, it’s quite another to admit to cheating and in the midst of that share that you wish you would have kept it to yourself.
Tino arrives next and everything is awkward and uncomfortable. He shares that he met a girl before the show, but nothing came of it because he didn’t want to jeopardize his chances of finding something on the show. But he and this woman reconnected after the show and he kissed her. He ‘immediately regretted it’ and it made him realize that he wanted to be with Rachel. Boy bye.
They then spend a ton of time on he said/she said and other semantics. Tino begins reading random quotes from a notebook that didn’t even look like it had been used. Rachel calls him a liar, and the timeline is getting fuzzier and fuzzier. Eventually, Tino steps out and says that Rachel is trying to make him look bad. He starts crying “Let me out!” to producers who are off camera. It never ceases to amaze me at how good this franchise is at getting people to completely crumble on camera.
Tino keeps dismissing his kiss as tiny and that is what’s most frustrating to me. Sure, the act of a kiss is small-sh, but think about all that might have been said to lead up to a kiss. It didn’t happen in a vacuum.
Additionally, I understand Rachel wants all the dirty details, but I have the hindsight of being in previous relationships where much worse has gone down, and honestly, knowing the details doesn’t make it feel any better.
In a last-ditch effort for another chance, Tino begs Rachel to keep trying, he promises to spend the rest of his life trying to make it up to her, but that’s no way to stay in a relationship. They’re both young with plenty of time to learn and grow from this. Relationships take work, but that does not have to include putting up with cheating and lying.
Not to mention, Tino’s anger and behavior been questionable since he got mad the week they were in Brugge. Anger is valid, always, but he’s been explosive, lowkey manipulative, and thrown mini tantrums when he hasn’t gotten his way throughout this process. His actions have been pathetic and childish and do not reflect a man who is ready to be a husband.
In their hot seat together, Tino does take more accountability for his actions, but Rachel ain’t having none of that. She looked pissed the entire time and there were several times when Rachel checked him for attempting to air out allll their dirty laundry. It’s wild that Tino doesn’t understand discretion when it comes to protecting their relationship (what’s left of it 🥴) but can understand discretion when it comes to sharing his cheating.
The back and forth between them is again mostly semantics and I hate to blame it on age, but the focus on giving a ring back or whether they were sorta on a break is mostly just immaturity. I don’t say that to dismiss Rachel being cheated on, that shit sucks, but at some point, you’ve got to be okay with walking away and not arguing with people who are committed to misunderstanding you.
In the end, they get nowhere and the segment ends with a surprise appearance from Aven who whisks her off to catch up with one another. A petty move from production. We love to see it. Aven and Rachel frolic off stage and Tino is left sitting alone, looking stupid.
Gabby’s Happy Ending?
Gabby and Erich both come correct in a beautiful white gown and a fitted navy suit. respectively. When Erich sees her, he gases her up a bit, and in the picture in picture we see Gabby cheesing hard. They exchange a lot of nice words, I love yous, get engaged and ride off into the Mexico sunset.
Back in the studio, Jesse loads a hot seat that will address how things have been between Gabby and Erich over the last few months. Then we get our second spon con: an extended trailer for The Rookie Feds. IDK what the show is about, but Nicey Nash is in it, so that’s something.
Erich comes out and he and Gabby are of course happy to see one another and be in public together. I take their extended kiss as a sign that blackface and alleged cheating/lying aren’t a deal breaker for Gabby. Unfortunate, but expected. Becca Kufrin was the same way with Garrett on her finale night. As a rule of thumb, I don’t put any of these people on a pedestal. They’re human and humans are mostly disappointing. I do love supporting the men and women from this franchise when possible, but blackface is a deal breaker for me, so I wish them the best, but I won’t be following along. Stand by your man girl, I guess 🙄.
Jesse asks Erich to address the accusations that he was dating a woman before the show. He takes accountability and says that he led her on instead of being honest about how he was feeling. I expected it to end there, but then Jesse Palmer puts a screenshot from the text messages this woman released on the screen for us all to see and he reads them out loud. Wild. Erich keeps his story the same, he led the girl on and used the show as an out. He said he’d never seen the show so didn’t expect much from the process, but then he met Gabby, and ‘everything changed.’
Gabby shares that Erich was honest about the text messages before they were released and so she didn’t feel blindsided or slighted in any way. She says when you say yes to an engagement, it includes the tough parts, even if you’re in the public eye. This is true, but the tough parts don’t have to include shitty behavior and blackface. Your partner can show a pattern of actions that don’t align with your values and you can choose to bounce.
I know I shouldn’t be shocked, but it is downright egregious that this segment with Gabby and Erich ended without his blackface being addressed at all. News of it didn’t really make it outside of Bachelor Reddit and podcasts hosted by people of color, but I’m still disappointed. I watch this show for the mess, but I still expect to see myself represented and I also expect who I am to be acknowledged and respected. Is production thinking about me and my small slice of the internet when they’re producing this show? No, absolutely not, but it’s so frustrating to be constantly gaslit by this franchise and told through actions that the feelings and opinions of their Black viewers and contestants (as well as other non-white contestants/viewers) don’t matter.
Evaluating My Top 4 Picks
After the first episode, I selected my top four for each of the women. I was both way off, and not simultaneously. I guessed that Aven and Tino would make Rachel’s top four and that Erich would make Gabby’s. As for my other guesses, most of those men were gone after week two.
One could argue that being able to tell where some of the connections were after the first episode means production did something right, but that’s too generous. This show is rather formulaic and unfortunately, I spend an embarrassing amount of time evaluating body language, promos, background music being played, etc. Plus, I’m a marketer by day, so it somewhat comes easily to me.
Our Next Bachelor
We had so many options when it came to Bachelor choices. There was Nate Mitchell, Michael A (assuming he doesn’t find love in Paradise), Tyler Cameron, Ethan Kang, and even Teddy Bear Tyler! Instead, we’re getting Zach. Regular degular Zach. I’ve been calling this man regular since his first one-on-one with Rachel and now I’m supposed to believe that 30 women are going to fight for a chance to marry Kronk’s nephew. Ok, sure. The one thing I’ll give Zach, he’s a good interviewee, straight-faced, and says the right things. What could possibly go wrong?
I was still seething through Zach’s interview with Jesse, but the gist seemed to be their setting him up as a pallet cleanser. He’s the great white hope that will take us back to the good, Christian days of Sean Lowe. Praise be! 😒
We get to meet Zach’s first few women and the audience got to vote on who received America’s first impression rose using a hashtag on Twitter. We got one Black woman for *diversity* and obviously, I participated in this sham of a show and voted for her.
This season is coming to an end at the perfect time. My vacation starts later this week and Paradise returns next Tuesday! I’ll be back in the new year after some much-needed time off. If you’re a Twitter user, catch me over there for my live tweets of Bachelor in Paradise. Thanks for rocking with me this season! ✌🏾
good recap! i definitely vibe with your overall sense of frustration with this season, personally I've found this season really boring/bland and think the producers are struggling to find fresh and interesting takes. i wrote my whole season 19 take here: https://cherryflavored111.substack.com/p/fall-in-love-with-an-emo-girl
would be interested to hear what you think!