BREAKING NEWS: We have a Golden Bachelor! His name is Gerry and he is 71 years old. He’s a widow with four (?) adult daughters and his season starts this fall! I am genuinely excited to watch this gentleman find love. He’s attractive and seems really sweet. Plus, the Golden Bachelor is allegedly only an hour long each week, which makes up for the fact that it will likely premiere at 9 p.m. CT (I like to be in bed by then 🤷🏾♀️). We’ll learn more about him and the women vying for his heart as time goes on, but for now, I’m excited to see this franchise shake it up, if even a little bit, with this new show.
Ok, now let’s focus on the mess that was this episode.
We are in Stevenson, Washington, which is giving beautiful landscapes, but it’s also giving low budget because why the fuck y’all got this Black woman in bumbfuck nowhere Washington? The lodge was beautiful, but this certainly wasn’t one of the lavish North American locations we’re used to on this show.
Jesse Palmer, also known as a Big Foot Enthusiast, gives us the elevator pitch for this middle-of-nowhere city in the PNW and delivers the first date card of the week before leaving. It goes to Dotun.
Leaping Into Love
Charity pulls up in a bright yellow Jeep to take Dotun on their one-on-one. But instead of getting Dotun and Charity’s car ride conversation, we get Brayden shitting on the men who claim to have a connection with Charity. He questions whether men like Sean are really feeling something with Charity when they don’t even know her favorite color (it’s blue according to Brayden).
Here’s the thing, Brayden has been nothing but honest throughout the season. Annoying, yes, but honest. He’s always had some healthy skepticism about the process and hasn’t hid that from Charity or the men, I respect that about him. My issue with him is that he’s obnoxious. Everything is about him, we haven’t seen him ask Charity one question about herself, except he apparently asked about her favorite color. Personally, this shows his age to me. His acting like a 24-year-old. Sure, he’s thinking logically about the process, but outside of that, he’s being rather self-centered and seems to lack a great deal of self-awareness.
On the date, Dontun and Charity are on the tallest bridge in North America. A bridge on which they will be jumping off. Not to play into stereotypes, but Black folks simply do not do shit like this. Our ancestors have experienced enough trauma for generations to come, no need to jump into a rushing river in the name of “love.” They do it though, twice in fact.
I love Dotun for Charity. He seems like a gentle giant and has managed to stay out of the house drama, while still remaining likable among the men.
During the nighttime portion of their date, Dotun and Charity are making smores, Dotun’s first! In his interview with producers, he said their date solidified that she’s his person 🥹. It was so sweet.
Dotun shares a bit more about himself and how he came to America. He came to this country at four years old, via a lottery visa. He says coming to this country saved him. Charity shares that she grew up in a homogenous area where not a lot of girls looked like her (relatable) and because of that she had to be (or was assumed to be) one thing and one thing only. But like every person, there are layers to her.
They exchange more compliments and pleasantries before Charity offers him the date rose and they get into a conveniently placed hot tub (at least Washington was actually cold). I love these two together. This date made it seem like they could be end game. You can tell Dotun gives Charity reassurance, and safety that I don’t think she knew she could have in this process.
Don’t Mess With The Skamania Scouts
On the date: Joey, Aaron, Michael, Caleb, Brayden, Sean, John, Tanner
The men are in the woods and even though everyone is in layers, because it’s cold, Brayden has decided to purposefully only wear a button-down shirt to assert his dominance. Idiot.
The Skamania Scouts are taking these boys (the word they use 😂) through a series of challenges to see who can provide the best for Charity. First, they have five minutes to find food, then they answer a series of questions about how they’d care for Charity, and in the end, Aaron is invited to spend some extra time with Charity at the kissing tree.
Brayden is confused at how Aaron was selected over him. He calls him a “cookie cutter dude” and again begins saying Charity might not be the woman for him based on the way she’s moving in this process. It’s like he’s never seen this show at all. Not wanting to share your girl is one thing, even with the premise of this show. I understand not wanting to see the woman you’re dating actively date other people, but Brayden is being rude and unfair. Why should Charity go all in with him, when he won’t even give all himself to this process? He may be honest at every turn, but he lacks tact and speaks without considering the feelings of others.
The guys are gathered around before the date after party and their basic banter turns into an argument between Brayden and Aaron, again. Brayden is sticking to the same story he’s had this entire season, it’s hard for him to be ready for an engagement when he and Charity get limited time together and she’s dating 20 other dudes. Sean asks if getting the first impression rose and a one-on-one date wasn’t enough validation for him and he ignores the question.
Charity comes in unexpectedly and asks why the men were having such a heated conversation. Everyone is quiet, afraid to speak up. Then Sean says he feels that it’s a waste of time to still be in this process when you’re not sure about an engagement at the end. The other men agree and pile on a bit before Charity pulls Brayden for a talk.
Brayden says his time in Washington hasn’t been good because he felt that she was mad at him. She asks him what’s making it so hard for him to stay in this process wholeheartedly, and he says he has no idea where he sits with her. Which is fucking wild. He got the first impression rose, he’s gotten a one-on-one date, and she’s kept him after several rifts between him and the other men, but he still doesn’t know where he stands with her. Bro, you’ve been validated literally since night one and much more than any other guy we’ve seen.
Charity asks what he needs in this moment and he says he likes her, but he doesn’t want to stay in this process. So, she walks him out. His lack of accountability and obsession with himself reminds her too much of her past relationship, so he’s gotta go.
I was so distracted by Brayden and his drama, that I didn’t notice Charity’s outfit at first. She’s in a maroon power suit with a black lace bralette and an updo. She looks great! I love a woman in a well-tailored suit.
With Brayden gone, the other men use their time to compliment the way Charity has handled herself so far in this process and remind her that they are there for her. In this episode, I noticed how much Charity checks in on these guys. Throughout the group date, when she had a solo moment with any of her men, she always asked how they were doing. I thought that was sweet and I want to see more of these men doing the same!
EXavier
I couldn’t help but notice Charity and Xavier greeted one another like they’d been dating for a minute. Love when that happens. They’re holding hands, walking through a fruit festival, bobbing for apples, making pear jam, cute fall things.
They’re vibing, having a good time, but Charity starts getting in her head because Xavier is reminding her of her ex. Oof, that sucks and is completely out of his control. She’s trying not to let it get to her, but in her interview with producers, the look of concern is written all over her face. Meanwhile, Xavier is looking at her like she’s the best woman in the world.
To quell her own fears, Charity decides to steer the dinner conversation to be about past relationships and relationship patterns. She wants to know if he’s ready for a committed relationship and what his expectations are in a relationship. He shares that his fear is not having love reciprocated back to him. He’s been in relationships before where he found himself asking for the same things over and over again to know that his partner cared for him, but he never really got what he needed. In his next relationship, he needs reciprocity.
Xavier then asks what she’s most weary about in a marriage. Charity says she’s worried about infidelity. This must be an awful way to live. When someone that you love so much betrays your trust consistently and with someone you know (at least I think that’s what she said during Zach’s season) I imagine it colors every doubt she’s had in relationships since. In fact, we know it does. She almost sabotaged the day portion of the date because Xavier reminded her so much of a previous lover.
Finally, we get to learn more about Xavier’s work and personal life are intertwined. Xavier’s mother has Multiple Sclerosis and he’s watched his dad care for her his entire life. His dad's love and commitment to his marriage inspired Xavier to pursue a career in science and healthcare. His commitment to his loved ones moves Charity to tears and he gets to date rose.
Brayden is Back
The men are feeling good because Brayden is gone and so they know they’ll get a chance to actually speak with Charity and have a positive night (lol no they won’t).
Aaron takes her first and gives her a massage because he knows it’s been a tough week for her. Honestly, it looked awkward. Next Dotun and Tanner get some special time before a big flip-flop-footed Brayden comes busting in the cocktail party. He doesn’t acknowledge any of the men, and instead, he starts opening doors and looking for Charity.
John and Charity are in their own world, making out, and Brayden just waits for them to finish. When they’re done, Charity is shocked to see him and asks for a moment of her time. He says he didn’t like the way he left earlier in the week, so he wanted to apologize for it. Wild that that is the only thing he wants to apologize for. The men are pissed because, for a third week in a row, he is taking time away from them deepening their connection with Charity.
Brayden leaves and walks past the guys again without saying anything, but the men aren’t having it. Aaron says something to the effect of “act like a man” (cringe) and Brayden yells some rude shit back. Eventually, John and Brayden are face to face and John shares how his actions have affected the night. Brayden half ass apologizes before he starts yelling at the other men again. They’re all shouting over one another and eventually, the door to the van Brayden is yelling from closes, and he’s gone forever (until we inevitably see him in Paradise this fall).
At the rose ceremony, Charity sends three men home, leaving her with six guys left: Aaron, Tanner, Sean, Dotun, Joey, and Xavier.
Michael, Caleb, and John were sent home. I really hoped we’d get more of John, and I’m shocked that he went home over Sean, I don’t really see the compatibility or chemistry between the two of them and he isn’t that entertaining to be getting one of the final six spots, so I’m curious what plans production has for him on other shows because that man is not gonna be Charity’s husband.
We end the episode with a mid-season trailer in which Charity is doing a lot of crying, all the men are having various levels of doubt, and in her final look, we see her break down crying.
We’re halfway through the season it seems, and with the petty drama out of the house (Brayden), I’m excited to watch Charity’s connections with these men flourish!
P.S. If you didn’t hear, the show is moving back to 8/7 p.m. next week! I wonder if the ratings have something to do with the switch? Either way, I’m happy about it!
Great recap, and cheers to a 9 pm bedtime!
how is the season already halfway over?? it’s been 4 episodes. they’re still in the west coast. and there are only 6 people left...?? i don’t understand!! that’s not how the is show usually works. it would seem her season is being rushed. which just doesn’t bode well for her finding a husband. we already talk about how fast paced this environment is. and now for her any full cocktail parties to get to know people-- it’s very sus to me. especially as a black bachelorette who is poised to pick a fully black man. why won’t they show us black love stories!!