Y’all, we made it! Whew! I have been so excited for this episode since they first teased Clayton sleeping with two women. I have been dying to know what possessed Clayton to overshare in the way that he did and after tonight, I’m still not fully sure why he made that choice, but here we are.
Three takeaways from tonight’s episode:
Production is cruel and will do anything to turn up the drama (like making three women share a living space again during fantasy suite week).
Clayton cares more about being right than being empathetic to people he claims to love.
Clayton is not ready for marriage and has no business trying to be anyone’s husband.
I still have questions, and I doubt they’ll be answered at the finale, but let’s just jump into the recap because I have a lot to say.
We are in a cloudy Los Angeles and Clayton is in the airport headed to Iceland. Weird we got a shot of him in the airport. A low-key sponsor perhaps? Must be. I feel like we have never seen these people in the airport. At least not with such a focus on Iceland Air. Obviously, this product placement worked because I’m wasting time talking about it.
Anyway, Clayton thinks he’s falling in love with all three women and he says he thinks he might already be in love with Susie. I don’t believe he said Susie’s name in the original recording of this. I think this was a bit of tricky audio editing. A good rule of thumb I follow is to only believe what is said if you see the person say it.
The three women are awkwardly waiting together in a hotel suite. This leads me to believe they’ll be sharing living quarters throughout the week and I fucking hate this gameplay.
These women should not have to see one another after their intimate overnights with Clayton. I’m sure their minds are racing enough as is, putting them all in the same living quarters is cruel.
Jesse Palmer comes in to tell the women what they might expect during fantasy suites and he delivers the first date card. Rachel is up first and Gabby and Susie have to awkwardly sit there and pretend to be happy for her. At this point, ain’t no ‘happy for you.’ Bitch if I’m competing for my future husband with two other women, I’m hoping for your demise.
In her interview with producers, Susie shares her philosophy on sex: she is only physically intimate with people she’s making a commitment to. I assumed this to mean people she’s in a relationship with. She says sex is an important part of a relationship and it would be hard for her to deal with Clayton being intimate with other women.
I understand Susie’s perspective, but I am surprised that she feels this way about intimacy and didn’t share it with Clayton sooner. Not because it would’ve stopped him from having sex with other women in the fantasy suites (although it might have), but because it may have made him approach them differently, especially since he said he was in love with Susie at the top of the show.
At this point, I assumed Susie’s overnight date would be last. This show is a pressure cooker and production loves to stir the pot.
Rachel’s Fantasy Suite
Rachel is excited about getting the first overnight. I love when they tell us the order directly. She’s driving to some remote Icelandic location to meet a smiling Clayton who is standing in the middle of a field. It’s clearly cold AF, why don’t these people have on hats?
Clayton and Rachel are taking a ride in a helicopter. Y’all know how I feel about helicopters. It’s a no for me. But the views do look beautiful. Clayton says he and Rachel have the strongest physical connection, which as a viewer is clear.
During this date, Clayton said something that I took issue with. He worries that if he’s not honest about his feelings, Rachel might lose some of her feelings. Clayton, baby, that is not how feelings work.
You might protect yourself when you realize you’re more into a person than they are into you, but it’s unlikely Rachel would stop having feelings for this man overnight. I mean, look at how she looks at him!
Rachel and Clayton are headed 400 feet down into an inactive volcano. Once they reach the bottom, Rachel asks Clayton if he has any more questions about meeting her family. He doesn’t. Rachel specifically asks him if he has any reservations and he says no, but she doesn’t seem satisfied with the answer. In her interview with producers, she says that she needs a bit more and is hoping to go deeper during the nighttime portion.
In between the nighttime portion, Gabby and Susie are discussing whether they’d be okay with Clayton going to the fantasy suite and being intimate with each woman. Gabby wants Clayton to explore with each woman and ‘choose her on purpose’ I’d like to be this way, but the way my insecurity is set up, not sure I’d be this cool about it. don’t think I’d quite be where Susie is at either, but somewhere in the middle.
Heading into the night, Rachel is unsure if she’ll say yes to overnights if Clayton doesn’t open up more. I love this. Hold him to the fire sis.
She says the rose ceremony after hometowns scared her because she couldn’t read him at all. She wasn’t sure if she was going home, or if she was getting the rose. She said this moment made her realize that she had no idea how Clayton was feeling. Eventually, Clayton says he’s falling in love with her, which only means something in this franchise.
What do y’all think? Is there a difference between falling in love and being in love?
I definitely think there’s a difference between being in love and having love for someone, but I’m not sure about what constitutes as ‘falling.’ Sorry, I’m a full-time, so I overthink language a lot.
Again we get Susie and Gabby talking again about where Clayton’s head is at and how strong his feelings may be for Rachel. Susie is doing an awful lot of talking in these interviews when she should’ve set this boundary before this week. There’s nothing wrong with what she’s saying and I mostly agree with her views, but she’s also operating from the space that Clayton already knows going into the dates who he is picking. And although past leads have said they always knew and tried to protect that relationship because they knew, as a viewer, I believe Clayton when he says he’s still not sure.
Susie’s thoughts also made me realize that these women do not get an opportunity to check-in before fantasy suites and that’s tough. It would be a lot to bring up their fantasy suite expectations right after meeting the family. I’m not really sure when else they’d do it though.
The next morning, we get the usual shots that insinuate Rachel and Clayton had sex. Rachel says she’s in love with him and Clayton makes breakfast that we never see them eat. On his way out, Rachel yells after him and says she loves him and he says it back with his entire chest. On a public Icelandic street. Susie, you in danger girl.
Back at the hotel, Susie is slowly spiraling when Rachel comes in and says “I’m sorry in advance.” I couldn’t do it y’all. I couldn’t do it. I’d want to smack that smile off her face.
Gabby goes to get ready for her date. While Clayton contemplates his time with Rachel. Hi’s scared of falling in love with all three women, which I will maintain forever is bullshit. No way you feel the exact same way and as deeply connected to three different people at once.
Even when I’ve dated multiple men at once, or thought I really liked two guys, there’s always been one that I could actually picture myself with. That’s what’s missing from Clayton’s thought process. Sierra was spot on at Women Tell All when she said that he confused love and lust.
Gabby’s Fantasy Suite
Gabby, being the Colorado queen she is, is actually dressed appropriately for the weather. Clayton drives up in an ATV (?) is that what this is? Gabby is too cool for Clayton. I think she would get bored easily.
They ride to the beach and it looks beautiful. Gabby uses the daytime portion of their date to see how Clayton felt about her family. Sidenote: Clayton’s sweater looks weird on him, but the color is beautiful.
Gabby tells Clayton she’s ready for engagement and life with him if that’s what she wants. She also shares that she’s scared of getting heartbroken, but that she wants Clayton to go all-in on his dates so that when and if he chooses her at the end, it’s because he’s sure.
It’s the nighttime portion of their date. So far, Gabby’s edit of her date is significantly shorter than Rachel’s. Rachel’s date was unreasonable long.
Clayton has another quarter zip under a blazer and I don’t understand why they have him looking like a male mannequin at JC Penney’s.
He starts another weird monologue that ends in “I’m falling in love with you.” I would love to know what the producers said to get him out of his head and to confess his feelings to these women.
Gabby and Clayton walk up to a bullshit igloo. This is exactly like when Ivan got the damn airstream overnight date while everyone else got beautiful hotel suites. I mean, what if one of them had to shit in the middle of the night? Where did they brush their teeth? This location seems like a logistical nightmare.
Next, we get this gorgeous shot of Susie walking down a spiral staircase while saying she’s spiraling emotionally. Incredible. Bravo production.
She’s worried about how Clayton might be connecting with Gabby and overall is worried about him being physically intimate with the other women when in her mind, it’s them at the end of this.
I’ve already said it in this recap, but I truly wonder if Clayton would’ve approached these overnights differently had Susie shared her philosophy on sex. But maybe she would’ve gone home like Teddi.
They next morning, Gabby all, but admits she was intimate with Clayton. She shares it felt natural and comfortable. Clayton’s love language seems like physical touch and I get the vibe that he’s physically caring, if ya know what I mean 😉.
Back in his hotel room, Clayton realizes that he’s told two women he was falling in love with them and he’s worried about what that means. He’s scared of hurting someone, but he knows he’s going to. Clayton, you should’ve thought about that before opening your damn mouth.
This is the part where people who have never been contestants like to say ‘you know what you signed up for.’ Fuck that. No, they didn’t. They don’t know how manipulative production can be, how much they’d actually fall for the lead, or even that they’d make it as far as they did. I believe most people go on this show thinking pretty logically, but once it gets down to this point, all bets are off. How are you not emotional? I don’t understand how the other women aren’t spiraling like Susie.
Susie’s Fantasy Suite
It is finally time for Susie’s date. She says she’s in a dark place and that this week has been the most challenging of her entire life. She wants answers.
She also mentioned earlier that she was confused as to why the women weren’t sharing what they experienced in their overnights, but I don’t think she realizes she’d hate that even more.
They’re going to a hot springs lagoon which sounded fun but looked miserable. At the end of it, all Susie shares she was getting nervous waiting to see Clayton. They haven’t seen one another in at least a week. By the end of the day, Susie says she feels hopeful.
While Rachel and Clayton’s physical chemistry is off the charts, when I see him and Susie together, I see life partner. I can see them renovating a house, having children, and on cheesy family trips.
During hometowns, Clayton said their first date quickly felt like they’d been dating for a while and I didn’t get that vibe from their first date, but I did get it during this date. It seems like a more mature love. Not to say Gabby and Rachel are immature, but it feels like Susie and Clayton have known one another for longer.
Unfortunately, this changes rather quickly during the dinner portion of their date.
Clayton is ready to tell Susie he loves her. He seems to have no doubts and is comfortable in saying that in his interview with production. What I don’t understand is if he’s so sure, why didn’t he just keep it close to the chest with the other women?
Susie has questions for him and she’s ready to make the decisions she has to based on his answers. Her daddy warned Clayton of this during hometowns. She don’t love these hoes and she will cut a dude off quick if he doesn’t meet her standards.
Clayton goes over the time they’ve spent together and says the night Susie admitted she was falling in love with him in Croatia, he realized he was feeling the same. He tells her he’s in love with her and thanks her for being patient with him as he processed his emotions.
Susie is truly shocked to hear this. She shares that she’s uncomfortable communicating her expectations, but she needs him to know that she’s not okay with him expressing his feelings of love if he’s said that to someone else. She straight-up asks him “am I sharing your love with someone else?” and the look of fear crawls across Clayton’s face.
Instead of tiptoeing through it, he comes out and admits he’s slept with another woman and expressed feelings of falling in love.
Susie says if Clayton feels he’s in love with her, then she wishes he wouldn’t have slept with multiple women. Very fair. Clayton says he has different feelings for different people, also fair.
Essentially, Susie had an expectation that if it were her, and he knew it was her going into the week, he would have protected their relationship for post-show, their marriage, and life together.
This makes sense to me. At some point, show be damned, if I’m going to be your life partner, then let your actions communicate that before you propose to me, just like they would outside the Bachelor bubble.
She acknowledges that her expectations would mean Clayton choosing to cut his experience short and not enter fantasy suites with the other women, or at least not have sex with them. During this conversation, she also mentions she didn’t want to give him an ultimatum which was a light bulb moment for me. The entire episode I wondered why she didn’t just communicate her expectations to him, but it’s because she didn’t want to feel like she was telling him what to do or encouraging him to not have sex with other women.
I also wonder if a small part of her wanted to see his true colors. If she wanted to know what choices he’d make without her expressing her concerns, fears, or views about sex.
Clayton apologizes and asks her to fight for their relationship. At this point, he’s admitting the ring is hers if she wants it. I thought this was bullshit.
He also says that had he known Susie’s requirements, he would’ve approached the overnights differently. We start to see Clayton combust here. He’s trying to convince her to stay, to go to fantasy suites with him.
Finally, he admits that he slept with both women and I think it goes over Susie’s head at first. She doesn’t react to hearing this.
At this point, Clayton needs to walk away. He’s stepping into dangerous territory and starting to blame her for his actions, which is not fair. I guess there was a lack of communication on both ends, but I gotta side with my sis Susie. If you think I'm your wife, your life partner and you feel confident in that, why not take one more week to protect it? Why risk your future wife for one good night?
Physical chemistry is so important, I understand why Clayton would want to have sex with each woman if he was truly unsure about his choices, but he told Susie that he was “most in love” with her. If that’s true and he realized that going into fantasy suite week, why not act accordingly?
Clayton is confused and talking to Jesse about what Susie said. He doesn’t know what to do next and says Susie “completely destroyed him.”
Susie and Clayton talk some more and she apologizes for not communicating her wants sooner, but she still can’t compromise on her boundaries. She says she feels awful, but that she wasn’t sure how she could have gone about it better. Clayton tells her that she invalidated everything they’ve experienced. I yelled ‘fuck you Clayton’ at the TV after this. He’s looking real shitty at this moment. He’s saying all this shit about how her actions are BS and he doesn’t believe anything she’s saying.
His switch from calm to callous was terrifying and triggering of past relationships. That moment when she’s trying to calmly talk to him and he’s walking with his back to her is truly bitch shit.
When he broke up with Sarah in a similar way, I thought it was because of her actions, but this is who Clayton is. He gets angry, makes accusations, doesn’t even try to hear the other person’s explanation, shuts down, and ignores them. He lacks empathy. This was utterly childish.
After the weeks of keeping Shanae, I didn’t think I could be disappointed in any more of Clayton’s choices this season, but this was egregious. He went from confessing his love for this woman to blaming her in minutes. Even if the real date was hours, the switch is still upsetting. This is the woman you love? This is the woman you want to fight for and you want her to fight for you, but this is how you treat her?
Clayton is right about one thing, relationships aren’t easy, and that is not a reason to compromise your values and boundaries if you don’t want to. Clayton’s reaction towards Susie also communicates that likely never considered that the woman he chose could choose to say no. This may be his season of The Bachelor, but it is all of these women’s journies and all of them has the right to opt-out for any reason. That’s what Susie did.
All season myself and others have said that he seemed to lack a level of emotional intelligence and conflict resolution skills and boy was this the culmination of all that speculation. Awful to watch.
The previews make it seem like he might still try to keep going through with this process? Fucking why? If Susie was your one and she needs time or is no longer interested, take the L. Don’t drag these other women through this bullshit just because you want a wife.
Instead of worrying about getting a wife, I want Clayton to spend some time navigating his feelings and learning to communicate in a way that gets his point across while also validating and empathizing with other parties. What a disappointing final 20 minutes. I have no other words.
Wild night, Dr. Jekyll came out.