Sweet ⭐️ Bachelor ⭐️ Buckin’: Bachelor 29, Episode 4
Drama continues to surround Carolina, and the ladies participate in a Cowboy Carter-themed date (not really).
Hello good people! In my recap last week, I neglected to mention the announcement from ABC that The Bachelorette would be put on pause this year. I understand the decision after seeing the women we have left from this season. While they’re all beautiful, none of them feel like a clear front-runner for the lead, nor am I particularly excited about any of them for that position. I liked Chloie enough to want to see her in the role — especially as a plus-size model — but ultimately, she’ll be a footnote by the time the season ends, making her a hard sell for Bachelorette.
As a fan of all kinds of reality TV, I like the idea of a pause to gather resources, shift gears, hire new production staff, and whatever else to come back better. I hope that is the case for Paradise this year and that we get a strong season and I hope this pause for Bachelorette will yield similar results.
At this point, I don’t think there are recent contestants that would bring new viewers into the fold. They either need a new concept (like Golden Bachelor/Bachelorette) or a celebrity lead that people can get invested in. We’ll see what happens, but I don’t see this as a terrible sign, quite the opposite.
Now, on to the episode!
We got tears in the first second of Monday night’s cold open. So we knew it was gonna be a bumpy ride!
The women are gathered in the living room of Bachelor mansion, recapping the prom-themed cocktail party they had the night before. Many of them are upset that Carolina spent so much time with Grant trying to hash out a miscommunication. Carolina understood the ladies’ frustration and even acknowledged their feelings, it seems, but we know that’s not going to be enough.
The group is in Madrid, Spain, for the week, and we get the weirdest intro packaged set to Cardi B and J Balvin’s I Like It. Have y’all noticed how many top 40 pop songs we’ve gotten this season? What was the music budget? Why couldn’t they spend it on better dates, so we didn’t have to watch these women frolic through stranded malls and jump off of buildings?
Grant meets up with the women and chats them up a bit before taking Dina on the one-on-one date.
Living Like a Local
Dina and Grant are exploring the city of Madrid for the day. First, they come across a game of pick-up soccer where Grant’s Spanish seems decent enough — and so do his soccer skills. Next, they join a group of couples dancing in the park. Finally, they come across a wall of wishes where visitors write a wish they’d like to come true and leave it on the wall. Both Grant and Dina wrote wishes about having happy and healthy marriages and families.
Throughout the date, Dina shares her intention to let her guard down and be more vulnerable than she’d normally be so Grant can get to know the real her in this short process.
As they head into dinner, both of their intentions are to go deep. Dina shares that she is typically very organized and determined in her career and non-reality TV show life. She shares that she’s often been called intimidating and an ice queen in her dating life because she’s career-oriented and very focused on her goals. Grant tells her that attitude reminds him of his mother. I know that’s supposed to be a compliment, but I’ve talked about this before in these recaps — I do not want a man to ever say I remind him of his mom. Absolutely not.
They both share a little about their upbringings and how it affects them in relationships as adults. Dina also thought to ask Grant about his seven-year relationship — which I didn’t even know about! Good call, Dina. It made me wish we got more of the leads dating history instead of having their time on the previous season overemphasized. This question from Dina made me realize we haven’t even seen flashbacks of Grant on Jenn’s season so far and we likely aren’t going to at this rate.
Dina gets the date rose.
Back at the hotel, the women are all hopeful for a one-on-one. They’re realizing that Grant is picking women to be on the one-on-ones when he feels there is already a spark. Not sure how true that is, but it is a good strategy. Why waste an entire date with someone you’ve felt no spark with? Especially in a process that is so truncated.
Despite having spent what the women say is the most time with Grant, Carolina says she wants more. That makes sense. She likes him, and she wants to keep getting to know him. But girl —read the room! She was talking mostly to women who have not gotten one-on-ones with Grant while she got to ride to a completely different state with him! Yes, this is all part of the process, and these women “know what they signed up for,” but that doesn’t mean it hurts any less when they experience jealousy or witness their connection falling behind the ones he has with other women.
Love is a Wild Ride
On the date: Alexe, Litia, Carolina, Natalie, Rose, Parisa, Zoe, Juliana
The group is in nearby Chinchon for their date. They’re spending the day riding donkeys around the town. This seems like a terrible experience. The donkeys are shitting everywhere and walking at different paces making it hard to get time with Grant.
They make their way to a stadium where they’re joined by a matador. She runs them through a series of drills that teach them the techniques of being matadora. However, all these lessons seem to be useless because they end up engaged in a mechanical bull riding competition. Which has nothing to do with the legitimate skill of being a matador. Leave it to the Bachelor to take a cool cultural moment/lesson and turn it into something so low-brow and lowkey sexual. Was it entertaining? Of course! But could we have done without the false matador lesson? Also yes. The woman who holds on to the mechanical bull the longest will earn extra time with Grant.
Most of the women fall off after a few seconds until Alexe taps into her inner farm girl and grabs the bull by the horns — literally — to hold on for dear life. The strategy works! She stays on for just under a minute — almost guaranteeing her the win. Then Zoe takes Alexe’s strategy and does it better — allegedly, she was the only woman who didn’t have a timer counting during her ride. So, Zoe gets the extra time with Grant.
The dinner party kicks off with a sweet gesture from Grant to Parisa. On night one, Parisa shared her love of rocks with Grant, so he got her Spanish (?) rocks to remind her of her time in Spain. It meant a lot to Parisa. Whether Grant thought of this himself or not, it was the perfect amount of cheesy and cute.
Rose and Grant check in after their awkward tiff last week. This feels stifled, and they both feel it, but it’s encouraging that they want to talk about it instead of ignoring it.
Next, Zoe and Grant get a chance to connect deeply about Zoe’s childhood. She was adopted and grew up in a predominately white area with (what sounded like) white parents and a community that didn’t consider her beautiful because of her skin color. So she grew up questioning her worth and desirability because friendships and romantic relationships were nonexistent for her.
Not only was Zoe’s story deeply relatable, but I was glad we got to see this side of her. I was ready to write her off as a pretty, mean girl when the way she acts is an adaptation that she used to survive her childhood and adolescence. Although it was clearly hard for her to talk about, Grant was grateful she did because it allowed him to understand so much more about her. I agree — this scene made me do a 180 on Zoe. I could maybe root for sis now lol.
While Grant continues his one-on-one conversations with the women, Carolina, Juliana, and a few other women discuss how much time they’ve gotten with him. Carolina — who again the women perceive as someone who’s had a lot of time with him — questions the process, saying she doesn’t think she could get engaged after only going on one or two dates with a guy. A valid concern, but babes, don’t say the quiet part out loud! That’s the kind of thought you keep to yourself. The women are shocked by Carolina’s admission, further driving a wedge between them.
Juliana asks to chat with Carolina privately and tells her she should watch what she says because she’s coming off as ungrateful. Carolina says despite her concerns, her intentions are pure, she just wanted to voice how she was feeling. Listen, was Carolina wrong? No. But she probably should’ve read the room (again) and kept some of her comments to herself.
As Juliana and Carolina make their way back to the after party, the other women decide to voice their concerns to Carolina as well. She gets upset at her intentions being questioned. Grant comes in to give out the date rose and can’t ignore the fact that Carolina is visibly upset and crying, so they go chat. Carolina shares what the women are saying, and Grant is unsettled by what he’s hearing. He wants to get to the bottom of the drama surrounding Carolina.
He returns to the women and decides not to hand out a rose for the night.
A Leap of Faith
I am so glad Sarafiena got this date! So often, darker-skinned Black women on this show are gone night one or given a fool edit. It was nice to see Sarafiena seriously considered as an option. I do not love that we’re getting yet another date of Grant and a woman jumping off a tall structure, though. We are in Spain! Where is the budget?
Sarafiena was super calm about it, but Grant was terrified, so of course, Sarafiena served as his protector.
Throughout the night, I couldn’t help but notice how realistic this date was. Specifically because of the vibes. It felt like we were actually watching a slightly awkward first date but in the best way. Both Sarafiena and Grant were giving cute, but nervous energy. They were touching the entire time, laughing awkwardly, and opening up about their childhoods.
This felt like the type of date that happens between two friends who have always found one another attractive but have been scared to cross the line. By the end of the date, they’re all in.
Last week, when I saw Sarafiena got a one-on-one in the previews, I was shocked; we hadn’t seen much of her in a positive light, so I thought she’d be a floater. I’m glad to be wrong! It was great to get to know more about Sarafiena and see her personality come through. I still think this process might be a bit too quick for her and Grant to get to a place where engagement makes sense, but we’ll see!
Cocktail Party & Rose Ceremony
Grant is rocking a beautiful olive suit with a paisley tie and rust details. It’s a great look! The first on him that’s stuck out to me all season.
He starts the night intending to get to the bottom of the drama with Carolina and the other women. He pulls Juliana to hear her perspective. Juliana says that all Carolina has done is complain about her time with Grant — which is news to him. He walked away from their date in Las Vegas thinking it was great, so to hear she might be feeling differently makes him nervous.
Grant confronts Carolina. He asks that if she’s having doubts in the future, she discuss that with him and only him, not the other women, especially since things keep getting lost in translation. Carolina leaves the conversation with Grant unsure about their future.
I liked that Carolina was honest with Grant about having concerns. Even though it might have been hard to hear, it’s a good sign that a woman who could be a contender to be your wife can be honest with you. Especially when she knows her honesty could be edited out of context or cost her a chance to continue in the process.
After her confrontation with Grant, Carolina finds herself in another one with Rose, who is still upset about Carolina’s accusations from the previous week. Rose feels like Carolina sharing their girl talk with Grant put a huge dent in their relationship — one they haven’t come back from.
Ultimately, Rose decides the stress of the process is too much, and she decides to go home. When she tells Grant, he’s understanding and doesn’t try to hinder her decision. With that unexpected goodbye, the cocktail party ends, leaving many women without a chance to connect with him for the second week in a row.
While Natalie and Parisa may have been blindsided by being sent home, this choice was unsurprising. We need at least one more week of Carolina’s drama before Grant’s ready to get serious.
Next week, the group is in Scotland — and Carolina is still getting on everyone’s last nerve!
Great perspective and insight.
Agree, Carolina is getting on my nerves - she's entitled to feel the way she feels but she needs to be less vocal about it cause AT LEAST she has had a 1 on 1. Rooting for Sarafiena hard! I'm starting to really like Zoe after her time w/ Grant, I feel like her walls are coming down. I also really like Dina.